I am the product of a same-sex household, having grown up with my mother and her partner of 16 years in a warm, loving, and supportive environment. I am also a person capable of rational thought and a follower of the teachings of Jesus Christ. Each of these complimentary parts of my person have been offended this week by the attempts of our nations political leaders to amend the constitution of the United States, banning same-sex marriages.
Political and religious leaders supportive of the amendment noted this week that allowing same-sex couples to marry will have disastrous affects on children, family, and society. I take exception to that, for obvious reasons. I do not consider my life a disaster, and while I welcome debate on that point from any politician who would like to make an appointment with me, I'd rather they didnt continue deriding me publicly. My family is not a disaster either; I count on them for support, we're close, and enjoy regular visits and correspondence, so that claim is a sore spot for me as well. Additionally, the work that I and my family do in the health care and education fields, and our active involvement with our church and other charitable organizations, hardly seem like a disaster for society. So that one stings a little too; it feels a little like an attack on my family. It's a personal insult to me and the hundreds of thousands of other non-disasters raised in same-sex households, and not one we should have to bear from our elected representatives.
I'm also offended as a rational person by the presented arguments for this amendment. For example, President Bush has stated that changing the definition of marriage would undermine the family structure. Putting aside the use of the pejorative undermine, this is insulting to a rational mind because it is clear that allowing same-sex couples the benefits of marriage will not change the family structure in any way. Right now, same-sex couples in every state in the union cohabitate, raise families, go on vacation, etc., and none of that will change with this amendment. My childhood is evidence of that fact as my mom and her partner are not legally married. This amendment does nothing, thankfully, to outlaw same-sex relationships, it just makes life harder for those couples by not allowing them the ability to share benefits and by defining them as second class citizens.
Neither does the amendment protect heterosexual marriages in any way, because unless some people arent being honest with their fiancés, husbands, or wives, no currently heterosexual person is going to marry someone of their own sex just because its legal. So the entire undermining the family structure argument for this amendment is illogical, because this amendment wouldn't change one thing save making nearly permanent the denial of equality to a group of American citizens. It is not the legal definitions that make a family, it is the actions of the people who come together to form it, as any rational person knows.
Finally I am offended as a follower of the teachings of Jesus Christ that this amendment has been trumpeted as if it were in some way in accord with those teachings. It is widely understood that this amendment is indented to please a particular religious orientation, but it is not in accord with Biblical wisdom like:
In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you,
And,
Do not judge so that you will not be judged.
Clearly this amendment seeks to permanently restricts freedoms and protections, a fate none of its supporters would chose for themselves, and judges those in the GLBT community as second class. Additionally I am reminded of the famous story of Jesus and a woman accused of adultery, a marital sin. While I do not believe homosexuality is a sin, there are those that do, and for them the parallels of this lesson cannot be ignored. To those who would have condemned the woman, Jesus said:
He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
